The Origin of the Thinking Cap

As I am sure this is the most pressing thing on everyone’s minds right now, I have taken the initiative to investigate the origin of the Thinking Cap. I will now answer the questions that have been burning in our minds for decades…


1.     Just what is a Thinking Cap?

2.     Why would anyone feel the need to wear one?

3.     Do they come in different sizes and styles?


To answer these questions I must ask you a couple questions. First…

What appears above your head when you get an idea?

If you answered, 'G.I. Joe with Kung Fu grip', please seek help…as in now. There are numerous multi-step programs available to help bring you back to at least the fringes of social acceptance.

However, if you answered, 'a light bulb', please continue as I lead you toward the answers with a follow-up question.

What would have appeared above your head

if  you got your idea, but before the invention of the light bulb?

If you responded, 'a torch', I will pretend you meant a candle.

So just what would happen if a lit candle appeared above your head when you thought of an idea, you ask? Well, hot wax would drip on your head. Not much of an incentive to think, though I doubt not too many people gave it much thought fearing, well…hot wax dripping on their heads!

That is, of course, until the invention of the Thinking Cap.

I have deduced that the Thinking Cap was invented to protect you from your ideas. The Thinking Cap was a hat of sorts; gabled and guttered to ensure the hot wax dripping from your ideas would be guided away from you to fall safely to the ground.

As to when the Thinking Cap was invented, very very small pockets of pseudo-intellectual circles, more like tiny rough ovals, believe the Thinking Cap very well may have been the trigger for the Age of Enlightenment. This would put its creation around the year 1637.

Lastly, the answer as to whether Thinking Caps came in different sizes. Based on the various sizes of hat boxes excavated from post Dark Age sites, the answer is yes. It appears the variety in sizes was to functionally accommodate the various sizes of ideas. If you were onto a big idea, you may be willing to trade the extra goat, and throw in the burlap bag of shit and sticks you had gathered, for the Deluxe 10 gallon Thinking Cap.

On the other hand, if you tended to only have a little birthday candle-sized idea every now and then, you may have settled for the Fez model.

I believe I have now accomplished what I had set out to do, so this concludes today’s blog.

If this leaves you feeling you had just wasted three minutes of your life you will never get back, you may be right. By now, you may realize my ulterior motive. I might apologize, but cannot as my mind has long since left this thought train. I am well into dreaming up my next ralph and hurl of words.